Thursday, August 21, 2008

Last Night's Dream

I don't usually have dreams or at least I don't usually remember them, but this one was odd enough that it stuck.  Let me share it with you:

I am going to interview for a job at Crispoe's company and I'm supposed to meet his "boss".  For some reason I decide to go only in a pair of blue and white boxer shorts with a non-secure fly in the front.  Apparently this decision was made due to the fact that Crispin's boss wanted to inspect my underwear (t-shirts and boxers) collection to ensure I was compatible with his company. 

I arrive for the interview and no one seems put off by my nearly-naked appearance.  But it turns out that Crispin does not work for a pharmaceutical company like I had believed, but rather is working for a state school (perhaps Bridgewater?).  Crispin brings me into his boss' office, but the office has multiple desks.  One of the desks is Mike's (Crispin's); another is some other random guy that looked a little like Mark Plasse.  Crispoe's desk is cluttered with porn and Howard Stern photos and his name tag has flowers and blood drawn onto it with blue ink.  Mike's boss (let's call him Stellan from now on) looks like this guy.  I have no idea why, but he does.

Stellan begins to interview me, but he isn't interested in my development or management experience.  Rather, he starts asking questions about my sister and where my parents me.  He also feels that my success in his company depends on whether or not I understand what an amortization schedule is and how to use it.  I reply that I've got this covered as my father is an accountant and I received my bachelor's degree in accounting.  He doesn't seem to listen or care now and goes back to asking random questions unrelated to the job I'm supposedly applying for (I forgot what the questions were at this point).  Throughout the interview process people are coming in and out of the office and Mike makes continual fart noises with his mouth.  Stellan (Mike's boss) gets frustrated and says, "I think we're done here." 

Suddenly I'm no longer at the college, but at Houston's with Mike.  He tells me that his boss had some feedback for me from the interview.  He said that I didn't answer any of his questions appropriately, that I didn't demonstrate a working knowledge of continuous integration and that boxer shorts were not appropriate attire for a professional interview.  I try to explain to Crispin that I was not asked any appropriate questions and that I was told to wear boxers, but he doesn't seem to hear me.  I also start yelling at Mike, suggesting that he was at the interview and should have "had my back", but he claims he wasn't there and that I've had too much to drink.  We order a bottle of Midleton and then I wake up.

So pretty much the only good part of the dream never gets realized because I wake up.  So there it is...analyze away.  :)


Harry said...

My analysis is that you are a cool dude!

Leo said...

Who is this mysterious "Harry"?

III said...

You better not sleep at night.